Our first pile of paper work.

Tuesday, December 11, 2012

I downloaded the application packet, 63 pages in all.  I printed it out and then stayed up until 3am filling out as much as I could.

Here's a basic list of what what was required in the application packet and what we had to do to complete it:

1.  A copy of our marriage certificate.  We had lost ours so we had to send away to the state for a copy.  It cost $5 and came about 10 days later.  Just google "Copy of marriage license and your state name" to find a link to the form to do this if you have also lost yours.

2. A copy of two years of past income tax statements.

3. A photograph of our family.

4. A list of 4 people to be used as references and their addresses so a reference form could be sent.  For my agency it requested that if possible one of the references were from a pastor or religious leader in your life.

5. A letter from our insurance company saying that the baby would be covered as soon as the baby was taken into our custody or we were "placed."  The legal adoption actually takes place about 90 days after the baby is placed.  It is illegal for insurance agencies in our state to deny coverage of an adopted child once they are placed.  Currently our insurance agency is saying they don't cover this situation so it looks like we will be having some lengthy phone calls with the insurance agency in the future.
6. A one to two page autobiography from both Sam and I.

7. A "Dear Birth Mother" letter or book.  This is a letter or book with pictures and and information about your family that goes to the birth mothers so they can see the types of families wishing to adopt.  More about this later.

8. A copy of a CPR certification card.  I took the 4 hour class one night with a friend.  It was fun and very helpful. Sam already had his certification.

9. Consent to do a background check on both of us.

10. An Affidavit of Good Moral character.  This was a document that lists a bunch of crimes like forgery and fraud and then has you sign to say you have never taken part in any of the listed things.

11. A release for the Department of Children and Families to send information on us.  I'm pretty sure this one is to show that our family does not have a history of abuse or crime or anything that would endanger a child.

12. Authorization for a Central Abuse Hotline Record Release.

13. We had to get our fingerprints taken at location so they could check our criminal records.  We signed up online for an appointment.  Paid about $50 and then went to the appointment where we had our fingers smushed onto a fingerprint scanner.

14. Release for credit information where we had to list all of our bank accounts and credit accounts.

15. 11 Pages of questions that Sam and I both had to fill out.  The questions were things like: "What are your hobbies?"  and "How do you feel about birth parents?" or "Describe your own childhood."

16. Health History of both Sam and me.

17. A form that a physician had to fill out showing that we were in good health.  We had to schedule these appointments and pay out of pocket- $85 for each physical.  Our insurance didn't cover it because they were not sick appointments.

18. A blood panel, TB test, and HIV test.  These were all out of pocket expenses as well.  We had to get the physical first so that the doctor could write an order for all of the blood tests and then go to a separate lab to have the tests done.  Then once the test results were sent we had to go back to the physician to get the form from the agency that they had now signed off on.  This was probably the most annoying part of the application packet but it was also kind of exciting because we were actively doing something towards the adoption.

19. A document stating the fees that would be charged.  They total $26,600.  We had to sign saying we understood the fees.

20. Another 4 pages of questions about our health and our feelings about adoption.  This seemed a little reduntant because we had answered very similar questions in the other application packet.

21. 4 pages of questions asking what type of child we were hoping for and what situations we would be open to.  We were able to specify the sexes and races we would be open to and if we would accept twins or sibling groups.  We also had to say what type of health history we were comfortable with and how much birth mother drug use, smoking, and drinking we would be ok with.

This part of the application was by far the most difficult.  On one hand, of course we want a healthy child and the safe thing to do is to reject any child with a bad family health history and to only consider birth mom's who used no drugs, alcohol, or cigarettes during the pregnancy.  On the other hand, it wasn't these babies fault if their mother's didn't take care of their pregnant bodies or their was a history of hemophilia or diabetes.  Why should they be punished or rejected again because of something they had nothing to do with.

Filling out this list was such a vulnerable experience.  It's almost like the totally feeling that if you make a living will that then you'll probably die soon.  Like if I marked off that I was ok with a baby who's mom had taken heavy prescription drugs during the pregnancy that my baby would surely be born to a mother of that description and surely have problems because of the use.  Here's a screen capture of a few of these pages:





22. A home study visit in which a social worker from the agency came to our house.  More about that in another post.

There were a few more items that were required but didn't apply to us:

-Copy of any divorce decrees.
-A child care class if this is your first child.
-Copies of any previous home studies.

1 comments:

  1. Thank you for sharing...so interesting all the items that are filled out.

    ReplyDelete

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